-Fire Talk- The flames of my nightly campfire flicker beautifully in front of me, and I scoot closer to the welcoming flames, my knees almost sticking into the fire. I close my eyes behind the black lenses of my mask and lose myself in the glow and warmth of the fire. It's something I do most nights to rid myself of the stress of this war. The other teammembers sit inside the base and talk, or listen to an old radio, but I don't feel welcome amongst them. Nobody ever understands me, and when someone doesn't understand you, their willingness to make contact dwindles like sun in an oven. Listening to a story someone is telling to you can be fun, even if they don't understand your replies. It's nice to feel wanted, to have your opinion appreciated. It's nice to walk away from a story, and have someone follow you because they want to finish telling you the story. I like being paid attention to, like every human, but the only moment someone decides to focus his attention on me is when I'm setting them on fire..... Nobody even notices when I walk away. I'm deemed unimportant during ceasefire, like a weapon without will, not worth paying any thought to when nobody is trying to kill you. I tried being more close with my team, telling them stories during breakfast and making small talk with them, but they didn't understand a word I was saying. Demo was asleep 99% of the time, Heavy just threw me out, Soldier tried to make me do push-ups, Spy was nowhere to be found, Medic tried to stick a syringe into my neck, Scout cut me off and talked about his awesomeness and Engie and Sniper tolerated it. I kept my chattering up for about three months, following them around endlessly and telling them everything I ever heard or experienced. I thought it was going pretty well. I thought Sniper and Engie both liked me a great lot, and that I was their friend. That is, until our Sniper finally had enough and ever so nicely told me to “piss off†and stop annoying him and Engie or he would give me a luke-warm golden shower and “cut me up like a dingo†before throwing me in front of one of Engie's malfunctioning mini-sentries. I took it as a joke and laughed at it. Until he actually got out a jar of jarate and hurled it at me before drawing his kukri and stalking close to me. I took the hint, and the scar that came with it, and finally left them alone. I don't stay in the mess hall anymore and I only talk during combat. And during ceasefire I just take to sitting outside by a comforting fire, trying to imagine that I am someplace else, warmth and comfort penetrating throughout my skin and burning out all the un-pure feelings and memories....I should have overcome my fear of walking bare-faced. I should have stepped out of my charade. I should have talked, should have should have shouldshouldshould......... .......I don't want to think about this anymore. I want to enjoy the night with a friend who does not leave me in the cold or threaten to cut me up. I stare into the fire again, and banish all thoughts, seeing them slowly burn in the flames and leaving my head. Fire is cleansing, growth, purity, and beauty. You know, I hope that hell really is filled with flames like all those books and movies claim. Burning forever in roaring fires- “Hye Lad ! How're ye doin out here on yer own?†I jump out of my skin at the drunken slur coming from right beside me, and in a flurry of battlefield instinct I throw my fist in the direction of the voice, missing our Demo's face by a hair. He dodges the punch and stumbles backwards with a startled expression on his face. “Wot in the bloody heaven is wrong with ye lad! I ain't no BLU!†I frown at his angry words. Why is he out here? Demo never showed interest in me before!.... Then again, he is never conscious during ceasefire. Wait a second. Demo never spoke to me before, he never went out of the base after ceasefire, and Demo never ever left his scrumpy bottle behind! So this Demo must be a-! “SPHH!!!†I knew I should have brought my flamethrower with me instead of leaving it it my room. Spies don't pay attention to ceasefires, I should have known ! I grab a piece of burning wood from the fire in a wild impulse, and pull my arm back in preparation of a sharp stab. With a bit of luck that BLU Frenchman will catch on fire and become some additional firewood. Yes, that will work just fine to make up for his rude interruption of my fire-time! “A what? What 're ye sayin' la-?! GET THAT AWAY FROM MEH!!!†The fake Demo tries to escape the viscous stab of my flaming stick by jumping backwards at the last moment, but I am faster, and I stab the burning stick right into the Spy's shoulder. I raise my makeshift weapon for a second stab, waiting for the tell-tale BLU suit to catch on fire and show me the color of betrayal beneath the thin disguise. You can imagine my shame and surprise when it didn't. For a second I stare blankly at the fire burning away at Demo's clothes and the dark skin showing underneath, the gears in my mind taking their sweet time to start turning. When they do I'm about ready to smack myself in the face with Soldiers shovel. This really IS Demo, trying to hit out the fire on his jacket! “FIRE!! PUT IT OUT YE CRAZY LOON!!†I drop the burning stick immediately, scrambling to retrieve the bucket of water standing beside the firepit, and I dump it over Demo, the small flames extinguishing with a sizzling sound. I feel my neck and ears turning red in shame as I struggle to find an apology, but before I can any further than “mmff†, my feet are swept out from beneath me by a rough kick, and I fall right onto my back with a wheezed muffle. “ARE YE DAFT LAD?! I'M YER BLEEDIN' TEAMMATE!†Alright, I sort of deserved that. The red paint of shame and anger creeps further up on my face as a soaking wet Demo throws his burned jacket to the ground and wrings the water out of his hat. I mumble incomprehensibly at the ground and stand up slowly. “Ye better be sorry! Settin' me on fire fer no apparent reason...'s a good thing me jacket can handle a bit 'a fire or ye might have burnt me flesh right off the bone! Why'd ye do somethin' like that eh?!†I wave my hands for a bit, and point at him, hoping he will understand my speech this one time. “Mf thfmft mff Sphh!†Demo raises an eyebrow in confusion, and I sigh, bringing an invisible cigarette to my mask and making a stab-like motion in the air to show him who I am talking about. I can practically see the lights flick on in Demo's eye. “Spy? Ye though I were a sneakin' Spy?†I nod, and mumble in agreement. For a moment, Demo looks like he's about to get even angrier, but a moment later the annoyed expression on his face makes place for a slight smile. “Heh, well, next time ye Spy check, could ya just use your team-friendly flamethrower instead of a burnin' stick? I myself don't fancy 3rd degree burns an' all.†Demo plops down next to the fire, and starts squeezing more water out of his clothes. “Mffu ffhm crrk?†Demo sends me a confused look. “What ye say now?†I repeat my question, hoping I don't have to find a translator to get my message across. “I didn't understand a word there, so I'm taking a guess. Ye want ta know where my bottle is right?†I shake my head and try to handsign him my question, but he interrupts me with another guess. “Ye want ta now how I lost me eye?†I shake my head again in slight annoyance and mumble loudly, pointing at him and then at the ground. “Ye.... ye want me ta lie down?†I groan and shake my head again, repeating the motion, drawing a question mark in the air as well. “Ah! So it's a question eh ?.... Erm... That doesn't help an awful lot there....†I sigh behind my mask and grab a stick to poke the fire with. Trying to get Demo to understand me is clearly a waste of time. “Ah wait! I think I got it! Ye want ta know what I'm doin' out here on my own eh? Am I right?†I pull my gaze away from the fire in surprise and nod quietly. “HAH! I knew I'd figure it out! I ain't as dull as ye all make me out ta be!†Demo laughs and also grabs a stick to poke into the fire. I spot a smirk on his face, and I can't help but suspect that he knew what I was asking from the beginning. I lean back, awaiting my well-deserved answer, but Demo only leans in closer to the fire to warm his hands. After a moment, Demo looks back with a look just as confused. “Why are ye starin' at me like that lad?†I can't believe it! He forgot answering the question! “Mfhhr hhfrr frhm!†“What are ye say- OH! Answerin' the question, of course! Sorry, sorry....I must've hit the Scrumpy harder than I thought!†I roll my eyes behind my mask, but an amused smile tugs at the corners of my lips. At least I didn't have to hand-sign him the question again. I half expect Demo to slur some stupid excuse for being outside, like ' I needed to feed the flyin' turles lad !' or ' Nessie's aint gonna like it if I ferget our revenge-date!', but the answer he gives me is surpisingly.... sober. “Well, lately ye just seem... lonely. And yea, I do have times where I'm not drunk. I asked some of the others ta come along and invite ye over to the mess hall for a chance, but they didn't seem all too keen on it. So I figured I'll hold ye company for a change! I'll do my best ta understand ye, but don't hold it against me when I fail, aye lad?†He gives me a broad smile, but I have no words to respond with. Demo actually noticing his teammates and trying to be nice, Demo not drinking or yammering about Nessie? If I hadn't seen him catch on fire without showing a BLU suit just a moment ago, I would be a 100% sure he was a Spy! “H-hurrm.....Whmf frrh?†He probably can't tie words to the baffled muffle that my mask emits, but the question in my tone is obvious, and Demo catches it. “What? Are ye sayin' it's unlike me to be so sociable an' considerate?! I'm sociable all the time!†I roll my eyes behind my mask and shake my head, a mocking chuckle coming out before I can stop it. “Yer joshin' me lad! I'm the friendliest of all yer sorry mess here!†I don't even bother answering that, and I give him my most mocking glare. Demo gives me a not-at-all-serious glare and crosses his arms in denial. For a moment, I'm a bit afraid that he was serious, but then Demo speaks up again, his voice jokingly exaggerated and dramatic. “All right then! All right! If that's the way ye want it..... I'm a no good unsociable drunkard! See what ye made me say there lad!? Oh poor me! Yer destroyin' all me self-confidence here! And I already had so little!†I can't explain why I find it so funny, but I do, and I chuckle quietly at his little act. Demo speaks up again, the serious note back into his voice. “I aint a liar though, I really did come out here because I thought ye might feel lonely.†I don't answer him. “Now... Ye might wanna ask: why didn't I come over fer a talk ever before?†Yea, Demo. Why? You didn't seem to be so bothered with me sitting alone and being ignored before. Why the change of heart? The question hangs thickly in the air. “The answer is simple lad; it's because I didn't know what it really felt like ta be really alone before....†A piece of wood in the fire crackles loudly, and for a second a dazzling dance of small flames and embers burst forth. Is he lying? No. I can tell when people act, I can tell when they lie, and unless Demo's acting skills surpass BLU Spies', he is not acting. Another question burns at my lips, but before I have a chance to ask, Demo answers it. “Ye know what was goin' on between Jane 'n me didn't ye lad?.... Well....when Jane an' I terminated our friendship, I became aware of the immense loneliness that came with 'is absence. I just lost myself the best friend I ever had, and I had no one ta go to for distraction, comfort, advice or fun. I lost me 'flow' too for a good few months, as ye might've noticed. Got inta respawn due ta liver failure as well for a few times. But I'm getting' over it, and things 're looking up fer me. But when I looked out the base and spotted lonely you and yer fireplace jus' now.... I realized you are probably more in need of some friendly company than I ever was! So here I am.†Demo looks at me with a somewhat sober and serious expression, clearly expecting either acceptation or rejection. I have to say something, I have to answer. Now or never. If I leave my mask on now, it'll be lost. If I don't give something, ANYTHING in return, he will turn around and leave me alone with my fire. I flex my hand and bring it up to my masked face, unable to prevent myself from shaking slightly. My gloved fingers run over the edge of my mask, and my thumb hooks beneath the mask. From besides me, Demo stares at me with visible surprise and confusion. “Lad, what are ye-?†I barely hear the word over the blood rushing through my ears. I clench my eyes closed and prepare myself to lift the mask over my nose so I can speak, my hands trembling. My breath becomes shallow, and I can feel myself balancing on the edge of a tiny panic attack. It's not so bad. Only so far that my mouth I visible... Oh god. I make a distressed noise, and tighten the grip on the edge of my mask, preparing to pull it away with a quick jerk, when Demo suddenly grabs my hands and pulls them away from the mask. “Ye don't need to do that.†I stare at him through my mask, trying to keep myself from hyperventilating. “I aint here on some terms, or on a contract. I'm here because I want ta be, aye? An'....If you don't like me here, all ye have to do is mumble, and I'll be gone, aye?†I nod, slightly dazed, and my palms sweaty inside my gloves. The silence stretches while we stare at each other awkwardly. “Err.....Alright then! Unless ye say somethin' right now, I'll be stayin' here at the fire pit. Three.... two..... one.....†I keep silent, and a moment of silence later, big grin splits Demo's face. “Haha! I knew ye'd say yes! Never had a doubt!†The tension is gone as quickly as it came, and I smile beneath my mask, giving him a thumbs up to clarify my mood about all this. Demo winks at me, or at least, I think he does. It's hard to tell when a person only has one eye. “Well, thanks fer sharin' yer fire with me, Pyro, I'm sure we'll get along! Hell, maybe we can even figure out a new way ta fight the BLU's! What d'ye think lad?†I nod my head and mumble quietly in agreement, giving him an additional thumbs up to make sure he couldn't misunderstand. There's nothing I'd want more than work together with my team to create new weapons! Besides having someone to talk to that is. And now, Demo offers me both. “Well I got the perfect idea laddie! 'S been in the back of my head ever since ye got angry and set the fridge on fire that one time, and I just know ye'll love it! Listen ta this:.... an explosive molotov launcher!†I let it sink in, think about it for a small moment, snort beneath my mask and laugh out loud. That is such a ridiculous idea that it might even work! “Alright, maybe that's not exactly the best idea, but what about this! Stickies filled with napalm! Aye ? I was thinkin' you could come up with some mix 'a flammable stuff that explodes inta flames when-!!†Even though I can't really respond without Demo misunderstanding me, being talked to is different than hearing someone talk. And Demo sure is talking to me. He even leaves moments open for me to mumble! ….. One of these days, I'll take off this mask, and give a proper response to a question. On a normal day. I'll just pull of my mask, place it on the table, and ask; “Did I ever tell you about that time I set a forest on fire?†And they will listen. But Demo will be the first one to see me, and understand me. Of that I am sure. “- and then KAZOW!! Ye'll see lad, it'll-....it'll....a-ATCHOO!!†I jump at the loud sneeze, and shoot a concerned look towards Demo. “Egh.... I don't think it is such a brilliant idea ta stay outside to talk about this while being all soaked like this... I'm gettin' back inside before I catch a cold! I understand yer need to stay with the fire, so I'll join ye tomorrow night, aye?†After I nod and mumble my good night wishes, Demo stands up and starts to walk away. I return my gaze to the fire, but after a minute of staring at the fire without enthusiasm, I start throwing sand onto the smoldering wood. It may be fun to stare at fire, but it's one burning hell of a lot more fun to have company. “Mfhh !Hfrmm ffrhm!†I jog after Demo to walk with him towards the base, leaving a still smoldering pile of wood behind.